SELF-HARM RESOURCES
Unfortunately, self-harm is increasingly pervasive among adolescent girls. A recent study found that up to 30 percent of teenage girls have intentionally injured themselves. It is important to remember that self-harm is not a mental illness. Rather, it is an unhealthy coping mechanism. Below you will find helpful information in learning about self-harm, the signs to look out for, and how to support your ZGiRL who may be dealing with self-harm or looking to support a friend who is.
WHAT IS SELF-HARM?
Self-harm is when someone intentionally hurts themselves as a way to release painful emotions
Someone who is self-harming might be dealing with intense thoughts and feelings, and hurting themselves may feel like the only way to cope
It can be incredibly worrying if you are concerned your child may be engaging in self-harm. It is important to remember you are not alone.
You can support your child, and learn about professional resources below.
SELF-HARM CAN LOOK LIKE:
Self-harm can manifest differently for everyone. Common types are:
Cutting, scratching the skin with fingernails, burning skin, biting the skin, hitting themselves, pulling out hair, picking at wounds
SIGNS A YOUNG PERSON IS SELF-HARMING:
Unexplained scars, cuts, burns, bruises, bite marks, or bald patches.
Wearing long sleeves or pants, not wanting to change clothes, etc.
Seeming low or withdrawn.
Expressing feelings of failure or hopelessness.
Emotional instability, impulsiveness, or unpredictability.
WHY DO YOUNG PEOPLE SELF-HARM?
Self-harm is a way of trying to manage difficult feelings
In the moment, experiencing physical pain can feel easier than feeling out of control emotionally
Self-harm can also be a way to gain a sense of control over feelings or a problem
Self-harm can be a way to stop feeling numb
Self-harm is a way to punish themselves for things they think they’ve done wrong
SELF-HARM IS A CYCLE:
self-harm can bring some temporary relief in the moment, but the feelings (and the urge to harm) will build up again. As the cycle continues over time, a young person may start to feel ashamed or frightened about the fact that they are self-harming - increasing the unmanageable emotions. This cycle can be hard to break.
HOW TO HELP:
An open conversation
Stay calm and non-judgemental: try to just listen, rather than “fix”.
Think together about what’s causing them to self-harm.
Self-harm is usually a symptom of something else that’s going on. Is something making them feel upset? Can something change to make things better?
Listen to them and offer reassurance:
“We will get through this together”
“I recognize your pain and want to help”
Help them do things that support their daily wellness
Healthy meals, exercising, drinking water, quality time with loved ones, enough sleep, reduced screen time.
When the urge to self-harm does build in the moment, having a list of other things they can do can help “ride the wave” of the intense feelings.
Strategies can include:
Writing down feelings in a journal.
Listening to loud music.
Taking a shower.
Exercising.
Going for a walk outside.
Hold an ice cube in your palm.
Place rubber bands on the wrist and snap instead.
Focused breathing.
Meditation apps like Headspace are a helpful start
Hitting a pillow
Talking to someone - a friend, family member, or helpline
A calming activity: painting, drawing, watching TV, baking, etc.
Calm Harm App - a free app that helps resist the urge to self-harm
Seek professional advice or support.
Try to speak to professionals early on, before things have escalated.
SELF-HARM RESOURCES:
Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a counselor 24/7
S.A.F.E. National Helpline: Call 1-800-366-8288 for referrals and support.
National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): Call 800-950-NAMI or, in a crisis, text NAMI to 741741
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 1-800-273-8255 for free and confidential support.
The Trevor Project: Text START to 678-678 or Call 1-866-488-7386 for support specific to LGBTQ youth
The Trevor Project on Self-Harm: Support for Self-Harm Recovery